Monday, July 25, 2016

Amy of keepin' up with the Smiths {The Mommylogues Series}

I'm so happy to have Amy as the guest host today for the Mommylogues Series! We have much in common but sharing a last name practically makes us family, right?! I love her words of encouragement over comparison and know you will too!

Hey there! I'm Amy & I blog over at keepin' up with the Smiths. {FYI: My blog is now private, but if you are interested in following along send me an email or leave me a comment below & I'll get you added. :)} Way back in January, when Whitney announced this series, I knew I wanted to be a part of it. I have enjoyed reading everyone's posts so very much.


Motherhood has changed me in ways that I never knew was possible. Motherhood has made my days brighter & nights longer. It has made my coffee stronger & meals quicker. Motherhood has made my house messier & floors dirtier. It has made my laugh louder & my tears fall quicker. It is by far the most rewarding thing I've ever done.

Being a mama, of course, hasn't come without its challenges. One of the biggest challenges, I've faced is the comparison game. I previously posted this back in January when Cash was 3 & Wyatt was just 4 months old, but wanted to share it all with you again, as I feel it is so important for new mamas, veteran mamas & all the mamas in between.

Back in 2012 when Cash was born, I was surrounded by first time mamas. A few of my friends & I all had babies {and all boys for that matter} within 6 weeks of each other. Talk about a wonderful support system! I was {and still am} so blessed to get to do life with these amazing mamas & their little ones, but if I'm being honest, there were moments {okay, a lot of moments} of comparison on my part. Your baby is sleeping how long? He rolled over when? Your little guy is eating solids? Now, he's crawling? And talking? And walking? The list would go on & on. Every little thing that one child did before mine, I would get this tinge of guilt. When was Cash going to do certain things? As Cash & the boys got older, my comparing died down. Even though I knew that each child develops at his/her own pace, I couldn't help but get caught up in the comparison game. I vowed that I wouldn't do that again.
Comparison is the thief of Joy - Deena Rutter at Modify Ink
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Well, enter Wyatt. I'm back at it again. I get so down on myself for comparing Wyatt to Cash. When is Wyatt going to sleep through the night? When is he going to roll consistently? So on & so forth. It's a dirty little game that I play with myself. Not only is it not fair, it's tiring. I know that I'm not alone & that many others feel this way. It's a very defeating feeling. For that, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry that you are struggling with guilt & comparison. I just want you, the overwhelmed Mama, to know that this is a season. A season that will pass just as quickly as the leaves change colors on a brisk fall day.

Successful mothers are not the ones that have never struggled. They are the ones that never give up, despite the struggles. - 10 Habits Of A Successful Mom:
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So, dear Mama, your baby will roll over, he will eat solids & learn to drink from a sippy cup. She will learn how to sit on her own & support her tiny little self. He will begin to rock back & forth & before too long, he'll be crawling. Your sweet baby girl will soon stand, then cruise the furniture & then she will be toddling along on her wobbly, little feet. He will learn his colors & shapes, go to the bathroom on his own & before we know it, we will send those sweet little babies off to school.

The time with these precious little souls is fleeting. We will blink & this season will be over. The tears, frustration & doubt that we've endured will be so worth seeing these perfect little humans that we've created face the world. They will no longer need us the way they've needed us for so long. They will be independent & strong, thanks to you. Thanks to your encouragement & never ending love, they will be able to hold their heads up high. Thanks to your tender heart & kindness, these sweet babies will understand how to care for others. Thanks to your patience & guidance, they will be able to do so many things. Things that we can't even imagine right now.

The Complete Guide to Imperfect Homemaking: {SimpleHospitality, Day 14} You Are Enough:
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So, dear Mama, if no one else tells you or if you haven't heard this for a while, let me be the one to say it. You are doing right by your children. You are doing a wonderful job. You are doing the best that is for your family. You got this.

The Days Are Long But the Years Are Short:
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28 comments:

  1. LOVE Amy so much. She is just the sweetest and always has something good and encouraging to say.

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    1. Oh, thank you so much, Beth! Love you girl!

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  2. Yes! So spot on- from the quicker dinners to dirtier houses and all in between!

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    1. Thank you! It is so, so hard not to compare & I try not to do it, with so many things. It's definitely a work in progress.

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  3. Yes yes and yes! Great job Amy! It's so difficult not to compare and I still do it even when I know better. Our babies all do things at their own pace and we need to just sit back and enjoy it. :)

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    1. Thanks, friend! You are absolutely right. I've gotten better over the past few months, but it's still definitely a work in progress.

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  4. I so agree with you! It's hard not to compare with others or between your own two children.

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    1. You are absolutely right! The whole mom guilt/comparison is another tricky game, that I do play, but it I'm working so hard not to.

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  5. Love!!! It really is so hard to not compare - especially with social media these days and everyone announcing when their child did what (I'm definitely guilty of that). Awesome post, Amy!

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    1. Thanks, Leslie! I'm guilty of it, too. Social media can be my own worst enemy. As much as I love it, it can definitely bring out some doubt in me, too.

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  6. Yay! Love Amy :) I used to compare Reese when she was a baby, specifically regarding sleep. It's definitely easy to compare your kids to other kids, but this is a great reminder!

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    1. Love you, girl! That was where a lot of my comparison was coming from, too. Oh the sleep. ;)

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  7. Oh my goodness so true! So hard not to play the comparison game, or the I'm a working mom and you're not and you get to do all these wonderful things game...oye, when does it end?!

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    1. You are so, right. To be honest, I'm not sure if it does. I feel as if there's always something being compared, although I've been working really hard over the past few months!

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    1. You are so sweet! Right back at you!

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  9. Oh! I love Amy and those sweet boys of hers! What a great post! Boy, the time really does go fast...I blinked and my baby just turned two! Now to convince the hubby for just one more baby! ;)

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    1. Thanks, Sara! Same to you, girl!

      I have the hardest time believing that Mim is two, also! Time sure flies!

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  10. Aww, I just adore Amy and her sweet boys. Amen to the stronger coffee, friend. The comparison game is so easy to get involved in. Especially when you’re a tired mama just longing for naps, all night sleepers, or a baby that will let you put him down long enough to reheat your coffee for the 4th time. We’ve all been there, I am sure. But you are so right, the days may seem long but the years are most definitely short. Don’t blink mamas….then you’ll have a big ol’ six year old like me. Great post! So encouraging and uplifting.

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    1. Thank you! Right back at ya. :) It is so easy to get caught up in the comparison game of so many things. I see it all the time & it is just so disheartening.

      I can't believe you will have a 1st grader!!

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  11. Oh my gosh, yes Amy!!! It's so hard not to compare and I've been there on multiple occasions, too!! Holden didn't say many words until he was two and there were times that we freaked out about it! But then, he turned two and went from not saying anything to saying full phrases. All kids are different and this is one of the best pieces of advice for any mom--new or veteran!!

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    1. You are absolutely right. Each child develops at his/her pace, I fully know that, but it is still so hard to not let the comparison games take over. Thanks for reading!

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  12. This was a favorite post of yours when you had originally posted it. I loved it and it resonated with me so much as I struggle not to compare my girls to other toddlers or get worked up over the little things. You are right, they are only little for so long that we have to soak it all up.

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    1. Thank you! I'm so proud of this post, too!

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  13. Amy, this is so perfectly said!!
    It's so easy to get caught up in the comparison game - especially with siblings.
    This was the perfect reminder to just enjoy the ride of these fleeting moments.

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    1. Thank you, friend! Yes, siblings is the worst type of comparison to get caught up in, but yet I've done it & occasionally find myself still doing it...ugh. These simple moments just fly, fly on by.

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  14. It started on sentence one and continued to the end. I fully agree with everything she said. And I LOVE that quote "comparison is the thief of joy". I refer back to it often. Great post Amy!

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    1. Thank you so much! I appreciate it! Since hearing that quote, I've referred back to it time & time again. It is absolutely spot on. But yet, I still find myself doing it, the comparison game. It's gotten better over time.

      Thank you again!

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